Turn 3 News

Greetings Earnest Readers,

While it may be true that life forces us to confront many truths, another force within our lives is time, and how it forces us to confront change. Truths may be something we have no choice but to bear, but change is something that is birthed from within, and time only makes us witness the signs.

And would you look at that? Somehow time has delivered us once again to the ending of our social season, and the changes that have brought us are profound, but certainly describable.

How about I start talking about the change reminiscent of the dazzling twelfth night, where the man in the mirror turned out to be…a woman. Charles Montague's grand reveal as Charlotte was certainly a surprise, an odd tactic to employ to regain the trust of society. This author knows it would be hypocritical to criticise the use of secret identities, although I am sure that the mysterious gentleman who crashed the ball has plenty to say, considering how they created quite the stir during the third dance.

Speaking of the third dance, the proposal between Albion Starling and Parthenia Fortescue was a showstopper for all the wrong reasons. If this is a love story then more than just saying yes occurred, as the intense stares of Duke Henry and Major General Baroness Alexandra was enough proof for this author to believe that this was a group decision. It is clear that those who are brainless will find that life is indeed painful when they think they can simply dance through life and its conventions, and society will change on them quickly.

Convention is clearly a detestable aspect to some, and perhaps it looks like Lady Lucy Ackroyd is taking a page out of her Aunt Temperance’s book, or a misprinted version of Cinderella's. Countess Constance's public outrage was matched only by Dowager Duchess Mary Chesterton's towards her own family. Lady Lucy's gaudy flamboyant dress wore her more than she wore it, but I suppose that's what you get when you let your heart win without thinking of the consequences. The time was not twilight but the sparkle dwindled to dull glass fast at the public scolding. Perhaps Lucy should look towards Henrietta and Georgianna on how to be a social darling.

Speaking of Darlings, awful rumours have been brought to my ears, as this author learns that the Dandy Lion is suspected to be operating out of their household. While time is expected to slowly change appearance,s it seems like time is impatient for the Dandy Lion, as recolations differ on the criminal’s appearance nightly. Could it be that the Dandy Lion is more than one person?

Violence is always a tragic means to a goal, and to glorify it would be to blanket the horrors that lead to such acts. As far as this author is concerned these rumours are completely unfounded. The Darling Household is exemplary and whoever started these rumours are more likely to be associated with the cowardly Dandy Lion.

Let us all hope that the Dandy Lion runs out of luck and time, and finds themselves in a position they cannot change. But will never change is the thrill that this social season has brought. Time refuses to wait for someone, so before you even realise it the next season will approach, and I will delight your eyes with my words once more.

Until then, please know that I will always be your obedient servant,

Earl Hollerback

We are pleased to announce that Lord Albion Starling and Lady Parthenia Fortescue were married last week at a small ceremony conducted by Father Vincent Prakash.

It is rumoured in the boxing world that a nobleman attempted to bribe boxer Ernie Pen to deliberately lose a match, so that said nobleman could profit greatly from betting on Pen’s opponent. Thankfully, Pen had enough integrity to ignore the offer and win anyway — an integrity that many assumed they had lost after their scandalous departure from the life of the Ton.

Percival Austen wishes to make clear to all who hear this gossip that, “I have been in the business for long enough to spot these plans from a mile away. I will be keeping a close eye on everyone involved in this sorry affair, and if they step a toe out of line again, they will find themselves banned from entering any boxing ring where I have influence (which is all of them).”

[cw: violence]

The Dandy Lion, once known as a stealthy thief who occasionally stole an item or two from a noble family, has now become a public menace and frightful figure across the Ton.

As well as looting houses, the criminal has left a trail of wreckage in their wake by destroying property, lighting fires and attacking innocent people, seemingly for fun. The authorities are now offering a sizeable reward to anyone who can help identify and capture the thief.

Reports from victims of these crimes differ in their descriptions of the fiend, making them even harder to track. Some describe a woman in a shoddily-made costume, others a man wearing a suit, and a couple have seen a well-disguised person in a costume that closely matches the one that the Dandy Lion has been reported to wear in previous sightings. It is no wonder that accounts are confused given the peril that these poor victims have been subjected to. Please be vigilant and lock your houses carefully at night!

The Chesterton family home was broken into recently by a thief intent on sabotaging the upcoming ball – The Bridge Burglar. As well as stealing most of Lady Katherine’s expensive jewellery, the criminal destroyed a chalk painting that had been prepared on the dancefloor and ruined the flower arrangements which had been purchased for the event.

The Chestertons are defiantly persevering in hosting the ball, and the family servants, who are in better spirits than in previous months, report that the duke is displaying remarkable (and surprising) leadership skills throughout this crisis.

(The opening extract from an article published anonymously in The Evening Times)

Celebrated composer Leslie Undrell has been revealed to be a fraud! Two up-and-coming reporters, who wish to remain anonymous to protect their identities within the Ton, have discovered that many of Undrell’s most famous pieces were, in fact, stolen from other artists.

Mrs Jennie Headington, a Belgian composer who has caused quite the stir around the continent, had a new piece for a string quartet stolen after a small concert where she debuted the work. Similarly, Mx Brooke de Bonne, a successful Parisian violinist who has recently begun composing their own music, had a symphony plagiarised by Undrell.

Perhaps the underhand, talentless thief thought that stealing work whilst abroad, then quickly fleeing to another country, would make them undetectable. Sadly, as always, his opinion of himself was far too high. Now the whole world knows the truth about Leslie Undrell.